Sibling rivalry. It’s as old as time itself. Kids will be kids this is nothing new. That doesn’t mean it isn’t frustrating or annoying for us moms. Today, I will give you my best tips and tricks to help YOU survive sibling rivalry.
I chose to tackle this from the angle of making it easier to cope with rather than trying to solve the issue entirely
Because honestly, let’s be real here, it isn’t really going to stop.
Even siblings with the best of relationships will still have their spats and squabbles. They will get jealous of each other at times. What can you do to stop that? Nothing really.
Looking back at my childhood with my siblings and comparing it to my children, I feel like I have it pretty good. Most of the time. Our kids do get along pretty well 90% of the time. That other 10% though…that’s another story.
Over the years I have learned to cope with it and allow the kids to settle the issues on their own. I refuse to be a referee unless they get violent with each other, which is rare these days.
Here are my tips to help you survive sibling rivalry.
Invest in noise cancelling headphones or ear plugs.
Right now you are either thinking I am a genius or a complete lunatic. I mean, who does this? *sheepishly raises hand*
The most annoying part of sibling rivalry is the noise. I like to listen to books while I putz around the house on the weekends so wearing headphones isn’t too weird and it helps block out the noise.
If I need to do some writing I wear ear plugs, the kind you would wear to a firing range that you stuff in your ear.
They work great and when the kids see that I have them in they tone it down a bit. “Oh, we must be really loud, moms got those things in her ears again!”
Have friends you can confide in.
Because misery loves company!
It is likely that many of your mom friends are experiencing the same things with their kids. In stay-at-home-mom world it can get lonely and isolating fast.
It is easy to feel like you are doing something wrong or wonder if what you are experiencing is normal. This is where swapping kid stories can be handy. You will probably come to realize that most of your friends are right there in the trenches with you.
Don’t have friends you can confide in? Find new friends.
One of my best mom friends is someone I met on a play ground a long time ago because both our kids peed on a slide. As mortifying as it was we were able to laugh about it and move on.
Look for those moms. The ones who try to make light of a seemingly awful situation. These moms are a little harder to find in the age of the sanctimommy, but they are out there!
Stay away from the ones who stick their noses up with their holier-than-thou-my-kid-would-never-do-that look on their faces. We’ve all seen them.
Follow other parents on social media.
Lots of parents, many of which are other bloggers, take to social media to vent about their kids. Usually this is done by making jokes about the nutty or obnoxious things kids do.
Sometimes this gets a bad rap because people take it far too seriously.
Here’s how I see it.
Parenting is hard. It can be very isolating. This makes for a very precarious situation for your mental health. Laughter is great medicine, even if it comes in the form of poking a little fun at our kids.
Not only is it funny but it tells us parents that are struggling that others are struggling too. It proves that it isn’t just our kids that are ridiculous at times, but that the majority of other kids are the exact same way.
In that, I find comfort.
Join the fun, make jokes about your own kids.
Okay, so I am *sort of* kidding here.
This may not be for everyone.
Humor in most kinds is therapeutic. There is a fine line between being funny and just plain mean or inappropriate (which I rarely actually see).
I do find it amusing to vent about my kids sometimes. Some of the things they do leave me wondering what planet they came from.
Many times though, once I put something that irritated me into a joke, I find that it wasn’t as awful as I initially thought. In a way, it puts things like sibling rivalry and picky eating into a different perspective. One that I can find humor in.
I hope you enjoyed this post. It was born out of my annoyance with all the noise and fighting over the last week. Another this is I want to bust the myth floating around that you can end sibling rivalry by being a better parent. This simply isn’t true.
The vast majority of us are already fantastic parents! Sibling rivalry is as old as time itself, it isn’t going anywhere! Rivalry between siblings is totally normal and helps foster problem solving skills in children. Yes, it is obnoxious at times.
Ladies, I am not going to sit here and pretend that I have the answer to every single problem we moms face. That isn’t realistic. My goal is to be helpful where I can and provide a bit of humor to the things I can’t. This post lies somewhere in the middle.
Keep doin’ you and get some headphones!